Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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