ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
