Cold hands, warm shart.
In the future we'll all be gay
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
MIDGETS
????
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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