biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize