Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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