i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
