those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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