I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
