We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
