i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Randomize
