Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Randomize
