Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
