I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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