idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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