fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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