so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Randomize