i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Randomize
