I can tuck mytits in my pants
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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