YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
