I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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