I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
