Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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