she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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