Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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