Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
