Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
