Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(417): View more from Missouri

Whiskey dick.

(810): View more from Michigan

Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.

(417): View more from Missouri

Everyday of my life.

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(702): View more from Nevada

I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds

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(708): View more from Illinois

i dedicated my morning wood to you.

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(520): View more from Arizona

Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.

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(301): View more from Maryland

Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?

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(513): View more from Ohio

Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?

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(440): View more from Ohio

its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice

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(805): View more from California

I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.

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