awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
