Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
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