Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Randomize
