my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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