why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
