Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
