Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
