u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
