I'm drive I can fine osifer
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
