White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
