I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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