If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
