I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
