windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
