Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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