Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Couch. On fire.
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