Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
