We're facebook friends in real life
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Randomize
