booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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