I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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