i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
