Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
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