Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
