You're completely useless in the revolution.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
