im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize