Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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